Family time didn’t go as hoped


So, a bit of story-time here. When I was in Kindergarten – elementary school me and my parents used to sit at a campfire on chairs, with blankets and some stuff to eat (and cook above the fire) + drink. Today, we wanted to do it again after almost 4 years. My grandparents came over because it was my dad's birthday a few days ago, no porblem there….right? We ended up sitting in the little cottage in our garden with a heater. I was fine with that but..No one talked to me. I'm used to be talked over but..I was the one who wanted to do the campfire. I sat there listening not being able to say anything. Then, what also bothered me was no one joined me when I started cooking some sausages above the fire. I stood there, alone, in the cold for 20 minutes. Just to go back inside, eat and do the same thing again. No one cared. They just talked and drank beer, ignoring me. My mother eventually wanted to cook something too so I joined her. Dhe started complaining about how she doesn't like this either. She told me I could leave and I did. What's the point of family-time if we're not doing anything together? I don't know. I'm sitting inside, hungry because my dad didn't make any food. He just brought out the frozen food which takes 20-30 minutes to be cooked with the fire. I just made myself instant ramen but now i'm crying because I thought this would be super fun. Why does nothing ever go as planned? Why do they ignore me? Why do I always have to be the one to sit here alone? I hate this. I hate this so much. I just want everything to dissapear.

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