I would first want to say that I'm a beginner. I'd say I'm fairly little, like a baby. I'm finding things out slowly, learning things slowly. It's like, a fun interesting adventure as I develop my spirituality. But there's a lot of things I don't understand about myself yet.
When I was a kid, probably 3rd grade, I was attending a yoga session. The teacher who was guiding us, told us to press our palms together as tight as possible or rub them vigorously for a minute or two, and then separate them only to feel a magnetic repulsion between the palms. A lot of the kids around me didn't feel anything, but I'm not gonna lie, none of them wanted to be there. The minute I felt the repulsion I realised, this is a power. Ever since then, I've been channeling this energy, just for fun. I didn't realise what this even was, but something told me it's very healing. So I'd channel this energy and put all of my intention into it- of love and positivity, and I gave to whoever I saw wasn't feeling great. I've never given it to myself so I don't know how it feels? I'm 20 now, and I've been doing it for ages. As I grew up, the "real world" impacted my imagination and my raw spirituality that was still present as a child. I began losing all my magical way of thinking, which meant this energy between my palms became nothing but a source of weird confusion and just some bullshit that's probably not real. And it was once Something that made me feel like "wow magic is real". This hurts me a lot. I'd still play around with it, and the energy died down a bit but never left. I haven't channeled in a long time even though I started my spirituality journey close to two years now. I recently read this comment section where everybody was talking about the energy between their palms and how as children they'd play with it, even with their friends! I was like, hold on! This means something! Someone mentioned it's what they learn in basic Reiki, but I don't know anything about that- though I've goals to learn reiki! I'm very interested in it. I'm drawn and I know I'm meant to learn it. If anyone knows about this energy, please kindly tell me anything about it! ❤️
I also wanted to know about this weird mystery I've never got an answer to and no answer or explanation ever naturally came to me, either. Usually somehow I get the answers, but this is something that I got absolutely no information on, not a single shred of information. Ever since 7th grade, or probably the 8th, I've been seeing hearts everywhere. To this day, I see hearts everywhere I go. I'm sure this isn't a unique case- honestly a lot of the time nothing is a unique case (I mean I'm only talking from the spirituality perspective.) I see hearts in everything, whether it's spilled coffee, or anything. I can't think of an example but they somehow always take a perfect heart shape. Since the very beginning of it, I always assumed it's my guardian angel that's sending me these hearts. I once asked my mother about it, she was kind enough to say yes I'm sure it's your guardian angel. Funnily enough, it was around the same time I first began my experience with the Virgin Mary. I don't believe in Christianity, I am not Christian, I don't believe in the Bible, nothing at all. Sorry if that offends anyone..not my intention. I just don't. I felt very drawn to Mary and I do, till today. For some reason my heart is completely for her, I love her deeply Because she's done nothing but care for me and love me even at my worst. Right after my first experience with her, I started seeing hearts a few months later. But I didn't think it was her, I thought it was a guardian angel. I still had no idea about spirit guides or that it could very well be Mary. I don't even remember how, I don't know where it came from, or whether it was intuition, I cannot remember what introduced me to this, but I realised I probably have a spirit guide and they could be sending me these hearts. I've been drawn to spirit guides more than absolutely anything, so so so intensely drawn to them and the need to know them. So even today, when I see hearts, I believe it's my guides and it's likely that that's the truth. And for the longest time I was drawn to the concept of a guardian "angel", not so much as an ancestor or an ascended master, even though I know Mother Mary is definitely in my spirit team. And when I started my Spiritual journey, archangel Michael introduced himself to me by drawing me towards a church and have me go there. It was a church dedicated to him. And it was weird I didn't even know who he was, till somehow he showed up while I was researching something on my phone and I realised wait the church I go to is for archangel Michael too! And at the same time, I found out that the same church is for the Virgin Mary too. My mind was a bit blown, and I love them both so dearly. I got the very very very intense need to research all about him, find his photos, I was unbelievably insanely drawn to him, and I felt deep love for him and from him. I see his name every where, everyday, till date. The same time I found the church, I began seeing angels every. Where. Every where I went, there were angel wings, halos, the word angel, it just followed me no matter where i went. And one day I stumbled upon the concept of earth angels, and having an angel soul, and I was like what? Why do I relate to this? And this one night, I had a dream that I was in a garden with a starry sky above me and there's a few angel friends of mine around me. I knew they were my friends from "home"? And they talked to me about how it's cute how much I love my boyfriend, or something. I need to mention that my journey properly started when I saw started going to this church. A month later, I got my first tarot deck and that's about it. I've never looked back. The year ended and 2020 began, and from the very beginning of this year, I started seeing angel numbers. Starting with 555, right as I was about to move to a different country to begin studying at uni. I made a tarot Instagram account, only to have someone DM me and ask me "what kind of an angel are you?" And I assumed it's a compliment Because what does that even mean?? I realised it can't be, so I just said, "hi, well, I don't really know haha, earth angel I'm guessing? I feel drawn to it and it explains how I feel" and she mentioned I was a "pink ray angel" and that I've 5 angel spirit guides and ascended masters. Which made sense, but I still don't know what a pink ray angel is. All I know is that my life purpose involves healing and helping and that's all I really care about. The point is, maybe the answer is obvious as to where the hearts are coming from, but I'd love to know people who see such hearts and have a possible explanation for it. And if anyone in general has any idea what any of this means Because all of it seems like I have angel spirit guides, and I mostly do but I'm also a beginner and my ego gets in the way of a lot of things so I can be mistaken.
Sorry this is so lengthy. I've never told my story to anyone which means I've 0 answers and when I tried with tarot, I struggle a bit. I've never met someone that's well into their way into the spirituality journey. So this subreddit is amazing!! I don't know a lot of things. To anyone that took the time to read, I thank you sincerely. It's honestly really kind of you, even if it's just curiosity, I highly appreciate it!! Thank you so much. I hope everyone has an amazing holiday, especially to those who are alone and may have lost a loved one. I hope all of you receive an abundance of love, positivity, happiness. A very merry Christmas and a happy new year. ❤️
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